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Dream Journal

Dream of a Spanish-style Chez Poulet

Back in my parents old bathroom. Sitting in a long, empty bathtub. I’ve found an old grooming toolkit (self-care) package of mine in the cupboard, birch or cedar-scented, but the important applicator tool is missing. I’m disappointed. A family member says we can order it online but when I scan it reads off as bipolar something-or-other. Lynae, who hasn’t been paying attention, suddenly asks what she can do.

Roaming through a nostalgia-scape, reviewing the past… November 2013 if I recall. It’s like the streets are numbered years. Looking to find (buy) a replacement for the lost part of the toolkit. Death Valley-like place, great view, fresh dry smell, isolated but well-tended semi-open-air store. Guy rides in on cow (or bull). Retracing his entrance, driving or walking along, I see the narrow strip of fenced natural desert he would’ve taken. There’s an expansive view of the valley floor. Drippy watered roads flow into rivulets and, further downhill, that water shoots from the mountainside in a powerful spout.

Going to artsy movie theater, think it’s not the movie I’m there to see but instead Lake Placid. In the opening scene (still looking for a seat and I’m standing near the right wall) people turn themselves into “pets”. Epic girl hero riding a dragon through a videogame-y fantastical castlescape. Boast that they have three Golden Gate Bridges. Screen is too high up, beyond it is an under-screen room, but there the main stage picture is off (while a live show is trying to get ready) and even that room’s secondary screens are relatively small. A Mortal Combat fight is playing. One fighter (the “good guy”) is just a badass tattooed-and-pierced arm, but his superpower is slowing time and taking 8 hours to finally hit the ground — his opponents usually become exhausted.

I leave the theater but am still watching a movie somehow, and I’m sitting next to big girl. I’m leaning on her we’re packed so close. As long as I don’t think that intimacy with a stranger is weird, she doesn’t either. We introduce ourselves; her name is Monica. She’s still on good terms with Chicken, which I discover by reading a handwritten mail over her shoulder. We get to talking, about a 14-year-old on Mission Street who’s just starting to experiment with makeup, and has garish outlined black lips. I like Monica and (though there is some attraction) we’re friends all of a sudden.

I go into Chez Poulet with her. It’s bigger, a converted funeral home that used to be for the many Mexican families here. Saltillo tile and arched stucco ceilings. Big room in the back where a community market is happening. She’s friends with one seller, we talk at a booth with them, making fun of another seller next to them we don’t know as well. That person is selling intricate carved wooden bowls, placed on shiny woven Asian mats. Monica and her Chicken friends decide to smoke pot in a back room, one with a Christmas tree. I start snooping around and discover that many of the signs I’d last left around the place were still in the same spot. At the far end of the right-hand wing, near the next-door radio station, I discover a neglected door and follow a secret passage. I can see through narrow high windows onto the tiled roof. The hallway passage leads to the Christmas tree room and I surprise the gathered friends.

The Chez Poulet has three bedrooms on the top floor, former accommodations for staff. As third person perspective, in the corner one I locate Chicken John. Instead of being angry because it’s me back in his place, time stops and I gaze at his true face. It’s both softer and younger than I noticed before, and also more old and damaged. His left eyebrow is janky, his forehead wrinkled, his hair is gray and sparse. No mustache. It’s like looking at an old kid. I realize the only way to get such a face is by doing art projects with people you choose to care about for years and years. I admire it and see in it the innocence that it really has. I float away, he turns into pissy mustachioed and porkpie-hatted Chicken again, yelling at me to go away, Orin. The other bedroom residents seem to be yelling it, too. This is when I wake up.

Slowly realize that I’m in bed and just had an interesting complex dream that I can remember, but feeling wary of the laptop beside me that’s there for writing it down. Gradual boot-up process. Distraction from writing the dreams details, though they don’t seem to fade… sometimes the remembrance is like that. Wariness of posting publicly. Allowance to let it be cast.

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Dream Journal

Dream of Cats in a Cafe, Car Out-of-Control

Visiting cafe with Lynae, have the two cats Katie and Aloysius with us. Lynae humorously insults how liberal the cafe is, a little too loudly for my taste. The barista is having a conversation with an older bald guy near the far wall about him taking LSD. Katie is climbing the brochure board behind the barista. When it’s time to go, I herd Katie into a cat carrier inside a larger cat carrier, then Aloysius goes inside on top of that one. Departing the cafe, making my trip to get the truck, I also end up carrying Patrick wrapped around my leg. He seems younger, but distraught and disheveled. I heft them all in the backseat (the cats are immediately all over the place). While I’m leaning into the driver’s seat area the truck begins moving forward uncontrollably. I have to steer away from the cafe where Lynae still waits, into the parking lot, and hoist myself into the seat with the car lurching forward.

The car is stuck in forward, and the the streets of San Francisco are mostly arranged hexagonally. I’m diverted away from my path back up to the cafe and instead keep going down (the area is reminiscent of Diamond Heights). Beautiful trees and houses, and some steep, sharp, unguarded cliff turns. I’m able, near the bottom of a canyon, to swerve the truck into a fishtail and get pointed back toward the cafe.

In another dream, Lynae’s laptop is a silvery flat rectangle that looks like mine, but is thicker. It’s our way of keeping them apart.

In a much earlier dream, I’m driving for Munchery and have to pause my deliveries in their garage. My sparkplugs are overheated. The brand name is Reese’s, like the candy, and they are similarly colored orange. This seems sensible cross-marketing in the dream, if something I’d never heard of before.

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Dream Journal

Dream of a Friend’s New Place

Aislinn is moving into a new place and asks me to help. It’s a former stripper or sex worker’s house and they played Magic cards. On the table are sealed little plastic tubs with the Magic creatures in them.

The room I’m in, probably the living room, is heavily sloped so that it’s only about 4 feet at the far side. I’m painting that wall purple. I open the front door for some reason and practically bump into a standoffish male neighbor. There’s confusion for me about whether I’m supposed to lie and say I’ll be living there, then later have to pretend we broke up or something. As I’m trying to congenially chat him up I attempt to grab the front doorknob only to find that there isn’t one on the inside. The neighbor became gruff, I looked and I’d simply missed grabbing the knob.

Walking around a swimming pool I watch as someone’s kid seems to be struggling. They’re on the bottom of the pool and their parent is right there, so I hesitate to rescue them. I preemptively take my shirt off anyways.

“So then we’re talking about a tribe of primitive vegans?” Just a glimpse of an earlier dream. That dream reminded me of one from another night a long while ago, walking around in a dessicated swamp in the outback, having been dropped off by a bush plane.

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Dream Journal

Dream of Dossie’s Neighborhood, and Musing on Deficiencies

I’m in the backyard of a house owned by Dossie with a group of friends. There are lovely winding brick pathways between flowerbeds and the yard is open to the neighbors, no fences. The neighborhood is wealthy and her next-door neighbor is amicable, letting cars park in front of some of his many garage doors. He has a cottage house built into the base of a sequoia-like tree, cozy and rustic. But the main house is an L-shaped A-frame ranch home, very wide. In the attic I imagine a collection of taxidermied polar bears, rusting Model T’s, massive ship propellers, and the like.

Later in the day I’m free-writing…

The problem of other people, of severe attention. Conflict within self, of not being able to un-perceive deficiencies. People aren’t like other things, they’re something almost equal to this mysterious “self” but not quite. At Pranayama practice this morning I found myself consistently aware of my own skepticism. An unpleasant feeling, but perhaps only because it belied my own lack of one-pointed awareness. That is, awareness of the deficiencies of others was only difficult because I therefore knew that I wasn’t “on”, that I was less than aware.

The most odd part, I’d say, was the moment the teacher mentioned the point of the exercise as to become aware of ourself as the entire universe. Hearing it come out of someone else’s mouth disturbed my previous perspective on those type of statements. It reminds me of an idea for a book I had yesterday: “How to Realize Your Spiritual Self and Still Get Respect as a Rational Being”.

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Dream Journal

Climbing a Telephone Pole

I was climbing up a telephone pole (or maybe just hanging out on it), a dirty old rusty one. A group of people passed underneath me on the sidewalk, including a woman who was the voice an animated rabbit when she was a girl. I couldn’t tell if they were aware of me or not. In retrospect, I might have been some sort of animal.

Meanwhile, in “another window” of awareness, I was watching a tutorial on road construction in SimCity. There was a hack where you could draw a 9×9 road grid, with diagonal extensions, connect grids together, then erase the parts you didn’t want — this would create a road in any shape. As the tutorial finished I heard the commentary of a landscape architect, saying this would help with playground design for years to come, and a saw a circle bisected by a path, with an even number of termini on top and odd on bottom. The conversing group, by this point, had passed. I didn’t notice the layers of experience operating at the time.

The voice actress had been a part of another dream where I was inside a trailer of sorts, actually a rail carriage. Smooth glossy white surfaces, cabinets on three walls with an unused shelf-ledge above each. The railway made a 90-degree left turn at some point. It was my family’s space (in some sense). Earlier, at the station, I had just barely made the train. I was the last on.

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Dream Journal

Four Dreams out of Winter

I’m something like a pre-teen kid, practicing in a small, hard-walled room with a mentor. There’s a fat cat on the top shelf of an empty bookcase struggling to climb up. It looks like Katie with Aloysius’ coloration. Seeing this, someone mentions nostalgia for when Lynae’s dad used to call her “his little hamster”. The mentor and I begin a fisticuffs match, and they have become invisible. I can still feel my punches land, but they are softer now, as if the mentor was made of foam.

First-person perspective, paddling down a wide, muddy river on a rainy day. It’s like the rest of the world isn’t there, just a gray wall. I’m getting advice from a compatriot walking along the shore’s path and move to the middle of the wider and wider river. Now in third-person perspective, I watch the single-person boat struggle on the outside of the flow, and go faster in the center. So fast, in fact, that it’s propelled out to sea — or at least out-of-sight of land.

I’m outside in the dark of winter with a few others, near a door back to our shared facility. There’s a strange woman who finishes her thing — a cigarette, talking to herself, digging in the mud, something — and goes back inside. I ask about her, can’t now remember the response, but a large replica of a hand-weight is then lifted into the air and gently placed on top of an old angled window, a window that’s pouring light from within the warm building.

Someone mentions that I should get in touch with Marc Fincham from Berlin. Soon thereafter, I look to my left and there sitting at an outdoor bench is Marc! No idea if it means much, but very surprising.

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Dream Journal

Dream of Red Panda

Our new black-and-white cat, Aloysius, spent most of the night mewling and crawling on the bed. Given that I’m not used to this behavior, but don’t want to encourage it somehow, I resolved to stay asleep. I faded into a dream where he was on the bed, but so was a small ferret-sized red panda.

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Dream Journal

Dream of a Store called Beached

Hanging out for what seemed like hours in this rich/upscale home. It was mine, or a relative’s, or someone who liked me very much. I was at a long, luxurious dinner party, in a charming and tastefully lit loft, with a rack of fur coats on hangers. This dream must have been earlier in the night, as it set the scene for another dream.

Friends of mine — or perhaps I, myself — opened up a new storefront called “Beached”. It was in a hipstery neighborhood blending part of London, San Francisco’s Mission, LA, and Berlin’s Kreuzberg. The store was angled from the storefront, and was structured around a large communal swimming pool, with a bar, changing areas off to the side, and an upper level with a jacuzzi lounge and clothing boutique. Reecy was there as part of an opening day crew. The store proved very trendy, and was a commercial success.

Later during this day’s events I would end up going to LiquidRom, but did not manage to fully write down the dream beforehand.

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(via Matt Mullenweg)

Bedeviled, human,
your plight, in waking,
is to choose from the words
that even now sleep on your tongue,
and to know that tangled among them
and terribly new
is the sentence that could change your life.

from “The Meadow” by Marie Howe

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Blog

Hello world!

Somewhere along the bumpy road of life I made a wrong turn and ended up in a metaphor, and so on that day a new and strange repository of words was born on the side of that road

and you, dear reader, ended up reading my poorly-thought-out dedication marker located just beyond the accident-scarred collision barrier of that road

and now you’re thinking about how safely you drive your own metaphors

but it’s ok — because when metaphors crash, they don’t crash like airplanes, they crash like couches

YES, THIS IS THE ACTUAL FIRST POST OF ORI.NZ