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Dream Journal

Strobble Noople-Poopin

Alexx Sanchez is in my dream somewhere, I remember thinking ” wow I it’s been so long. I don’t know if I’ve even dreamed about her”. I’m sure I have, but no earlier than a few decades ago, she’s someone I last knew in high school.

Sharing a sizeable horde of money w Angelica. We have to hide the burner phone after it’s brought up by third party friend, suspicious someone had taken the money, who doesn’t realize we have and are keeping the secret. We need to erase their memory… problem is such a technology doesn’t exist. do we just disappear on them and pretend?

A water dispenser on a top cabinet leaks. While I’m up there, I grab a plastic diner-style coffee pot — my dad (or someone related to me somehow) throws it away because don’t want those hot microplastics in his body.

From atop a structure, I spot a beautiful baby tapir in shades of blue and pink wander into our camp. Gorgeous creature. I remember too late to try and get a photo and it’s a little too far away. I get one distant photo and a bit of shaky video. I go to prepare a grain snack for the critter. But the grain shelf has a forgotten jar of prepared oatmeal which is now a science experiment. I forgot to eat it. Best left alone perhaps.

The Title: was just a lot of fun, some phrase definitely within yet assuredly unlocated within the night’s stories.

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Dream Journal

Prepping to Present an Upside-Down Australia Story

I’m preparing to give a talk presenting a story of mine from when I visited Australia. Adding a surprise twist even the organizers aren’t expecting by giving it standing on my hands. The story itself dates from 2006 — a period of heightened right-wing bullshit during the Iraq war, the Abu Graib prison scandal (I was, incidentally, in Australia at this time). The story is basically that I’m in a cafe and ask for eggs upside-down. This plays off a familiar meme with a highway warning sign, “WARNING: Australia”, which is humorously upside down… land down under, and all that. Or at least this is the story I make up to tell. The actual events involve me fussing with my website and asking the cafe runner about a location on the web design she made. Later on I’ll reflect that the whole thing reminds me of the Odd Salon matter last summer.

As it’s getting late in the afternoon today, I wander across a near empty school playground. I reflexively think that it’s too hot out, but upon reflection I realize it’s actually perfect outside. Under a tall metal play structure I begin collecting a pile of my stuff left there, but under that I uncover a pile of stolen Australian props — street signs and peeled-off tarmac crosswalks — which would clearly be useful for my upcoming performance. I don’t remember putting them there, and it does feel as though I’m being framed. Perhaps instead I’ve actually gaslit myself by simply not remembering. Very, very difficult to say…

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Dream Journal

Tiny European Country

Visiting one of the tiniest countries in Europe, GaiMiTn or something. It’s an unusual place for people to take a vacation as there’s not much there, but I’m content — resolved that it will be special for me. I roll downhill along a suburban road, houses on one side. The border is a few streets away. It feels novel, knowing so few have been here. When I traipse through some mud, I know most people will never have the dirt of this country on their skin. I envision a brief walkthrough of a primeval European forest, foliage I’ve never been near before, but which strikes me as immediately familiar, archetypal. The plants my ancestors survived by knowing well.

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Dream Journal

New Neighbor Backyard Boundaries

My wife and I encounter our new neighbor in the shared backyard. We leave some money and supplies in a small pile there, and while we’re climbing upstairs (the building is large and open-air in the back part) the neighbor gives it back. They say that it’d just be too much to manage everyone’s stuff and the landlords stuff without getting confused. I tell them that’s a good idea, and that setting clear boundaries with him is a great idea.

I’m climbing a telephone pole to avoid running into them later — it’d be an awkward social interaction — but then if I go the rest of the way up, I’d then have to tightrope walk across the power lines to get to my home… which I don’t really feel like doing either.

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Dream Journal

Last Day of A Sliding Rink

Using a location randomizer, I find a quirky convenience store that sells a kind of orange liqueur I used to like a lot. That section has several brands, this one is Hawaii Rind or something like that. Standing next to the different orange-colored bottles I can vividly imagine the taste, far sweeter than what I would want to drink now. The store has an indescribably nice vibe though, with twisty little aisles that you can see over. It has a homemade feel. Novelty items are interspersed with staples like chips, nuts or candy. They might actually be playing Boards of Canada over the speakers, the walls under the high ceilings decorated with oversize posters and zany memorabilia.

I watch several videos tagged at the store and their entertaining. One starts because a guy films a screen which dispenses a humorously malformed Muslim prayer (intended as a novelty keepsake) but the moving sidewalk he’s on keeps moving him till it abruptly ends, the rubber printed with an oddly-worded warning not to let shoes get sucked into the conveyor. He immediately rounds the corner and sees someone wearing toe shoes, broken into four segments instead of the usual one for each toe, made of vintage brown leather. Looks like he’s writing with his feet. The guy videoing starts making the sound “brother, euhhh” like the meme, but realizes halfway that — no, those are leather gloves on hands — so it becomes “brother, euhhhoooh”. The cut at the end of the clip gives an impression someone took care to trim the end for good comic timing.

While I’m browsing the clerk makes an announcement that today at 8pm is the last chance to get something from the store. I’m surprised, but I’ve happened to visit on their last day of business. I would like a keepsake, I admit. Sitting down, my face reflects on one side of double doors to the kitchen — the door has a cutout of the mayor, so that you get to imagine yourself in charge. That’s partly how I work out that this place is in Chicago, as it’s Chicago’s mayor.

I pass through to the store’s back area which is used as a recreation space for parents and their small children. The floor is of highly buffed smooth linoleum. Using a single run-up I take a very long careening slide. Quickly I learn how to lean to steer, how to keep my momentum going, how to playfully dodge the many families in the rink. I’m really quite good at it. But I promise myself that I’ll only do this one excellent slide. I know they’ll be closing soon, and I know it can’t last forever. That makes it count more somehow. Soon enough, the end arrives. I’m one of the last out — or no actually, the last one. The sun changes into a nostalgic gold and tints the grass verging a nearby stream. The arena is then folded up into a compact object that resembles an upside-down table. I’m granted permission to take documentary photos of it, hoping one day I might replicate this design myself. I certainly enjoyed myself. There’s something difficult to photograph though, a distraction of some kind…

I wake up very early and find this dream quite pleasant. Unusually, nothing else seems to have woken me up. I couldn’t get back to sleep.

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Dream Journal

Rearranging the Formal Garden

Picking out from a line of available cars from grandma, who has passed on her collection. I realize after I’ve made my pick that I was only considering between the cars in a certain category that felt like the one that was supposed to be mine, neglecting to evaluate if there were better options in other categories.

Watching Dune 2 in a very long oversized movie theater, the rows separated by big distances so those in front or behind don’t disturb each other. I feel as though I am a powerful or dangerous entity here, as though I am hiding my power level. But others could be too.

On screen, the movie is more reminiscent of the setting of Dune 2 than the story. We pan over an extended slope of sandy hill with dunes, a helicopter (or more likely a ‘thopter) plunging into them. A friend, Andi, is a character there in the film setting.

A few of my rats have a deep tangerine tinge to them. Concerned, I search around and discover they’ve gotten into a container of cranberries. My wife soon notices them lying on their sides together covering in the almost-red goo and I’m able to quickly explain that they only ate a bunch of the cranberries and destroyed the box.

Moving benches in a formal garden, split into quarters. Place one bench diagonally in the center of a raised grass square which is girded with brick. I move the other benches together on the opposite side to make a denser gathering space there. In order to push them against the far wall, I have to move a long pair of risers stacked one on the other. Those turn out to be mirrored L-shaped equipment movers, with heavy duty wheels on one end. They might prove very useful in the future.

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Dream Journal

Sharing Space (at a Party) with Plarvolia, and It’s OK

I show up to a big art party bash, one of those semi-regular community-wide fun Bay Area events, where I quite soon run into Plarvolia. It’s too late; there’s no pretending; we both have seen that we have seen one another. We share the same reaction: while niether of us likes being in the same space, ignoring each other might be tolerable. She is wearing a pair of obliquely-angled blinders over the edge of her glasses — I spot them as we perform our mutual heel-turn about-face. The blinders give her exasperated/embarrassed expression a heightened cartoonish quality.

The party is rather lively as there’s lots to do. Vibe is creative and friendly. The event is laid out on a wide unsteep staircase, more of a single-sided ziggurat I suppose, such that one can see the swath of the revelry both up and down. The mood is light enough that she and I end up nearby on a few couches. Without discomfort, we can idly observe and even eavesdrop thus finally getting a genuine read on the other person — perhaps the root of our earlier failure to connect. Eventually we even flow into shared conversation. It comes as a striking relief for us both, this passive lifting of the unresolved tension and harshness we carried these years. I observe her former warniness replaced by a sort of wan disappointment at her own misjudgment of me (or simply unlucky judgement). She realizes I could’ve made a nice friend — still could be — and who knows what else — in the end all the mistake cost was wasted time. None of this is acknowledged verbally. By the end as the party is emptying out, she invites me to meet outside, or later, something like that. I say “we’ll see, I’m gonna help clean things up here for a bit.”

And that’s exactly what I do. I don’t think much about it for a bit, as I quite enjoy having a bit of camaraderie with the party organizers (and I usually do). I do take a moment though to reflect how I’ve managed to leave her to herself, to let her invitation to furtherance sit and rest. She may choose to either wait for me or to go off for her next thing, as she pleases. I didn’t overthink it.

I wake up quite early. I recognize the significance of a Plarvolia dream like this. I write only a brief description, nudging myself to remember it the rest of the day (one such trick I’ve learned over years of writing down dreams).

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Dream Journal

Old Bedroom Illusion, Zebra & Giraffe Chase, Mental Patient Rescue

In my old room in Cathedral City I imagine I am wearing my sleep blindfold that I wear every morning. While staring at the window I imagine the room to be a simpler place, with flowers decorating the desk below the window. It’s hallucination within a dream. Most of the room is taken up by books left there by Patrick when it was his room — sometimes two bookcases deep. There are a few old posters on the wall, which I’ve left up as I’m simply too apathetic to remove them

Several giraffes have randomly joined a herd of antelope in a sloped desert canyon outside Las Vegas. Following them on motorcycle, I see a tall head peak from behind an electrical substation. I’m off my bike temporarily and the giraffes summoned zebra which would kick me to death. but I rush and to get back on my motorcycle, speeding off just in time.

On the edge of the open plain where the zebra chased me down I ride past a refueling station for bio-fuel cars. It’s weird to think that driving such a car during my lifetime I’ve used fresh green leaves as fuel from a station like this. Now we have much more compressed versions available.

I walk down the hall of a mental hospital prison, perceiving the intricate infrastructure built into such a place, intentionally concealed behind dirty rough slabs forming the walls. I find a mother-daughter pair housed in a blocky suite of rooms. I realize the two are only sick because they’re being kept here. Part of my plan and coming here was to break people like them out. I just have to wait for the end of the day shift and the nurses to complete a headcount before locking the door for the evening. One of them stares right at me as I perch on a low bed against the interior wall, though I manage to still go unseen — I practice invisibility like the witch Seraphina Peccola.

At the last minute before I do the breakout, Sarek from Star Trek shows up from the hall. The dream itself and my ability to maintain immersion breaks up as I break through the glass window victoriously, smashing it with my wallet tool like a pair of brass knuckles. My female co-conspirator is waiting outside to help us with a quick getaway across the wide parking lot and dry summer grass plains.

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Dream Journal

Roads of San Francisco

I’ve taken charge on handling an absurdly tall Victorian mirror (measuring over 8 meters) which I gently lay on a long sheet. I’m in what appears to be my parents old bedroom in the house I grew up in. While I’m very careful and never break it, it’s so long that it flops about end-to-end like a giant semi-stiff ribbon. I imagine the kind of Great Hall where such a mirror might even fit; a grand old San Francisco mansion on a hill perhaps. Echoes of another dream: a house of tall rooms curving along the outside, a slight hill, flowerbeds and iron fencing, perhaps converted to a hostel.

Using an unfamiliar route through a posh neighborhood of large homes, I notice two particular large buildings. My eyes are lead upward as I appreciate their distinct old timey theme and quaint names carved on the outside. Though one is clearly meant British one Frenc, they fly opposite flags. Perhaps what were once embassies have become private homes and the eccentricities of wealth. The street becomes more crowded just a little ways on, with tourists. I realize I’ve become turned around and am headed north toward the bay and I’m near Fisherman’s Wharf. I conclude that the buildings are now explicitly to service the hordes of visitors, though in what way I don’t know.

When driving down a roadway I become trapped in a line of cars which must turn around due to an unlabeled street closure. Very useless and frustrating. When I finally make my way out I find an official riding a horse and inquire/complain. The portly bald private contractor (I remember looking at his face) says the city allowed them many more horses than signs, which is why he’s riding a horse. There is no further explanation.

I have to take a road through a poor neighborhood where we once considered getting an apartment. I spot the place, with its janky plywood hillbilly door still exactly as it was, a scraggly old punk character smoking a cigarette outside. The neighborhood is just like this. It’s what they’ve allowed to be built here. The only thing you can get to across the street is a cheap FoodsCo market — which has very similar plywood scaffolding draped over it’s entrance. The place feels crowded and neglected at the same time. The most efficient way to leave this part of town is actually with a shortcut through a private parking lot. And, as you’d expect, they can decide to close the gate or restrict access whenever they like. Truly, what a shitshow this place is.

I’m diverted down a rural route through the hilly and less developed middle of SF. I pass a row of square little slope-roofed cabins which are rented out by the zoo like Airbnbs. Beyond a frail chainlink fence they sit on stilts above a slow marshy creek under eucalyptus. This is the first time I’ve actually seen them, and I immediately decide I would one day like to rent one out, maybe have a trip weekend there.

Riding in the backseat of the family SUV with my dad and brother in the front, we park in a dirt lot in a little isolated development on a side road in the boonies. I’m consulting my map hoping we can get a brief walkthrough, but I declare that I’m not sure there is a path through the private property fence… just as a girl in black sunglasses and dark hoodie strolls past, rather demonstrating I’m wrong (and that my research is ineffectual). Shortly after, while clambering over rocks I realize that I’ll need shoes. My legs are so dirty though from some mud earlier, I figure I’ll have to find a place to rinse if I have any hope of keeping my shoes clean. I’m afraid now it’ll be a whole thing.

[[Unexplained note: wife 4 guys, Corey B. 6 guys, but when is there time for me?]]

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Dream Journal

Fleeing in Mexico Resort, New Lover at the Piss Tent

Mexico, possibly Oaxaca, but a place which appears more like the Sonoran desert south of New Mexico. Temporarily my wife and I are staying at a complex of buildings (a resort I believe) with many areas: stone gazebo, collonade, buttress balustade wall… One very distinctive moment was when I floated over a pool whose bottom appeared painted, but actually the striped layers of natural sediment giving the appearance of a topographical map — I understood that it was a very rare environment miraculously conserved here, like some kind of placid natural geyser, and I spot wriggling aquatic coral snakes very close as I pass by (I should note this to someone, as these snakes in terrestrial waters are both rare and dangerous).

There’s a smaller property tucked between larger plots which has itself set up as a single attraction theme park, a line of tropical canopied boats on a flume track which performs a circuit underground, similar to Disney’s Pirates of the Caribbean. With somewhat marvelous luck, they’ve managed to compete with the much bigger properties around them in staying relevant.

My wife and I have been storing a trailer full of our stuff here for as long as we can, left in a sandy side area where it ought to go ignored. But it happens that we discover that my wife has to hide for a little bit from government agents looking for her. The plan is for her to immediately flee for a small labyrinth tucked away in an obscure corner of the complex and marked by mean on the map — I will meet her later after casually being found by the agents while lounging amongst a balustrade wall and stalling the agents. The plan becomes less and less viable as my wife continues watching engrossing video with me instead of leaving.

I practically sneak up to an infrequently visited door I at the end of hallway, sometimes regarded as employee-only, but I’m in on the secret today. The setting seems to be a venerable San Francisco institution, a store like Paxton Gate or 826 Valencia or perhaps the Audium. In fact I’m just trying to get to the bathroom.

I find one — but oddly it feels like a bit of the dream is missing here — the scene and setting have changed. I have no entered a tent made into an ersatz public restroom, one set up for so long people almost treated like it’s perfectly normal. Inside I find a folded-over kiddie pool full of old pee, but also gloves? Not as gross as it sounds… no smell simply jarring. Earlier I had seen and interacted with a woman outside just before entering the tent. An slightly older woman, attractive and self-determined, I’m glad to meet with her approval — she pees on my exposed leg over the cesspool of gloves and things get sexy refreshingly fast. It’s nice to be with a woman who knows what she wants, and who happens to want me at the moment. I’m eating her out with lots of enjoyment when I must interrupt the adventure to take a phone call (from my dad, of all people). I have enough reserve and I’m in a good enough mood to listen fairly well… and for a long time. The woman is so patient and appreciative of my patience also. While I listen I gaze at one of my tiny rats there in the room with us, perched in the open (after having been tracked down by me in an earlier dream which I can’t quite place). By the time the proceedings resume my wife has arrived and she too eats out the women, while I move up to suck her nipples. This is a spontaneous and welcome episode of joy.

The three of us are naked in the backyard on picnic benches when our landlord, newly clean shaven, and his wife arrive. He looks like Shepard Book from Firefly or Blameless Marad from Horizon Zero Dawn. The pair of them leave but actually come back in a minute, which I find a worthwhile breach of expectation. He begins to speak, starting with something like “nine years ago you paid the foundation of…” I accidentally interrupt him by complimenting his new look, a bit embarrassing but we have such a mood today it’s hard to break out of. The interruptions happen a few times in this way. I don’t recall exactly how it may have ended, as the tensions recently with our landlord have been high, but there may have been a sour node with his wife specifically, who’s never much talked before.