Certain times in your life your life makes you wanna take lives. That’s the nicest way I can put my feelings about today.
You know the kinda day I’m talking about. Mamma told you about them. Swear to God, somebody pushed the asshole button. When that button gets pushed — it’s usually hidden somewhere near the furnace by the old mason jars — look the f*uck out. The effect is not selective. We’re all assholes. Yes, you. You are an asshole, sir or madam. That asshole in the other room. Assholes on the phone. I didn’t have one spare second from you people today. Me. I am an asshole.
Let me ask you something: you ever turn into another lane without signaling? Of course you have, ya’ damned liar. We all do. Just cut it out for tomorrow, ok?