Tag: Dad

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Dream Journal

Spork the Cat has Kittens in a Traveling Home

My Dad sits under tree. We sit together under a tree and watch a film projected on a portable screen, sharing in sadness.

Spork the cat (normally my male rat, mind you) has had kittens. She’s young and this is her first litter, and in a weird space. It’s shared with a number of people (all of whom I know in waking life), a large travelling quarantine structure. Perhaps it’s a bit like a hostel, but of people who all know each other. The gate is tall double doors like a church door, in the far corner of an open high-ceiling room, with sloping edges near the walls in a flattened “V”. The next room is an light airy bunk bed sleeping/lounging area, billowy drapes and a grid of rafters. I find a conch shell similar to my own under the blankets of an middle-aged Asian acquaintance, Dav. It has a narrower stem/tip and blows easier and louder. Childhood friend Robby T. is also in this dream, chatting lazily from his bunk with me during sunny midday.

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Dream Journal

Logs in a Tree, Hip Ground Floor Squat

Tree logs stored high up across two trees. A ladder is up there too, blocking access. I look up and point out to my companion that there’s a hawk sitting on a branch directly above us.

The self-appointed minder of this open plot of land is a creepy psychiatrist, a young man who is clueless enough to stand staring at you from behind a couch to “observe” you. I point this out to Lynae, or whoever is with me. Someone escapes out the front door and into the music store across the other side of the mall (they don’t get far).

Behind the tree with the logs is a water chute leading back to a mill pond with a lovely population of loons (ha!). There are inscriptions in concrete, familiar yet written in some Southeast Asian language,

I sign up for a documentary show with Ricky Gervais, and as part of the contract we have to record banter to be played over the footage for at least 9½ minutes. We record it in the back of a car and then I’m told, jokingly, that the rental lasts another 120 minutes. My old friends Chicken and Kelly are in the front seat, smoking, and making out with the smoke.

Driving with my dad, early morning around 4 am, on the streets of our desert home that looks covered in a sheen of smooth white snow. I have a stapled-together packet of printed papers that’s about fighting others’ belief in mental illness, something I’d planned to read on the drive. Dad gets me to close it with a frustrated “really?”

Weird cheap flat on the first floor of a dirty yet hip ghetto. A side street near the heart of the city, clumped-up forgotten backyards and trash gathered in the dead-ends. My friends are thinking of buying this place — or maybe they already have? But that could just be a cover story for a squat, I think. They’ve converted a windowless room in the middle into an “orgy space”, which I guess means stuffing in a ton of pillows and chairs. Bafflingly, there’s only a heavy sheet separating it from a front patio area packed with couches. Ghetto but very cozy.

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Dream Journal

Freeing Pets of Many Sizes

A friendly stubby pet caterpillar, the last of my edible caterpillars. I release him in the rosebushes on the side of the Cathedral City house, near my parent’s bedroom, hoping that he reproduces someday. Later I find him in a planter in the very moist ground (so moist it’s nearly half-full with water). Nearby the hole, in the hedgerow, I find a pet parrot and hamsters that were also released some time ago.

I check on the status of a mouse cage, with very tiny mice — about the size of a pill capsule. The original two have indeed started breeding, with minuscule little mice crawlers lodged in the corners of their cotton-stuffed plexiglas half-shoebox cage.

A beluga whale in a backyard pool? Something like a Christmas wish I made as a child, which my parents had to convince me wasn’t a good idea.

Tracking a feral neighborhood horse outside the Cathedral City house. Driving with my dad in a Mercedes, his Mercedes, we finally find it upon reaching the end of our court, across from a wide lake on the other side of the main road. I say “Great! You know what you can do now? Leave it alone.” Dad leaves car idling at end of the street, takes off for work via different method. Patrick drives car back slowly along the narrow, overgrown court. The neighbor’s tree branches hang low enough that they block their house lights from reaching across the street. A neighbor woman has poor personal boundaries and tries to demonstrate where the light would be going, by entering into the house on the other side of the street.

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Dream Journal

Bait Locker, Alien Repellent, Rustbucket RV-land

In a locker room, lots of stuff I need to gather. I head out once my time is over, my two friends waiting outside the heavy glass door, before realizing I still left a bunch of stuff. In the bottom half of the locker, the compartment is open so I can reach in and find other people things. There’s at least a few pieces of funny money left as a trap, I assume. The steam room hot tub adventure cost at least a couple hundred bucks.

I am a scientist like Rick Sanchez and I’m inside my house during the course of an insectoid invasion. I am one of the only people with an alien-repellent sound barrier. The insect forces go to great links with transparently fake news reporter interviews trying to discover how it works and to overcome it. I see a diagram of the architectural plan of the house with the bedroom just outside the laboratory and the clean room.

I’m in the small kitchen of my family’s old Cathedral City house. About twice as many people live with us now, and I think of them as in my family. There are two refrigerators and an upright freezer next to each other and we’re even thinking of putting another refrigerator blocking off the counter corner. I’m using a glass tray to keep a group of aquarium feeder worms alive. I have to use the same tray to store macaroni and cheese above the worms. Meanwhile, two younger kids are bothering me, throwing food and interrupting my project. I ask my dad, who is staring into space eating cereal, to tell them throwing food wasn’t okay. He responds apathetically, and in frustration I fling a spoonful of grits at him, spraying the entire kitchen corner. He still doesn’t react.

I move into a community of rustbucket houses. Old RVs and trailers are pushed together into a complex warren-like structure — everyone seems to have built a private hobby space so they can sneak off by themselves to do work, camp chairs inside old shipping containers stocked with rebar. One green RV from the ’40s has a particularly unpleasant individual in it, but a beautiful slide-off stove in the kitchen, converted to be an outdoor courtyard. It’s a very welcoming community, but also “is this how poor people really are?” is a question that comes up. At some point I try to see if I can build a large house on one of the unfilled plots of land. The small house just downhill from the main road was one of the first built.

We go off and drive on an adventure in an old VW van. We stop at a large gate down the road, waiting with an invisibility power-up activated. When a train comes behind us the gate opens and we can use a speed boost to drive overland far away from where we’ve driven before. What would take 20 minutes only takes about 3, but we still don’t reach our destination — a place called Challengeburg.

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Dream Journal

Father Knows Nothing

Visiting my dad at his home. Park my motorcycle by pulling it upright, waiting for another rider to pass next to me, then pulling in adjacent to a baby blue convertible.

(New) Patrick is at the house, he’s proudly been driving around that 1930s-40s baby blue convertible roadster. I halfheartedly go through a few movies I’d be interested in seeing together, before she heads out the door late for something and I comment “do you have to drive stick on that thing?” As she heads out one set of double doors I peek out and say I just wanted to say I love you before you go.

In the yard there’s an elaborate and creepy statuary set centered around my late mom, behind a tetrahedral protrusion of fake gold from the ground. It represents my dad’s wealth from the wildfire payout, which was bigger than I knew.

It’s revealed that Patrick, like me, has a $200k reserve account. I respond incredulously, “say that again?” A $130k account for me… ha ha ha. I try to ask my dad what it is he thinks I need, and he’s prepared a list on a shopping bag, which he wrote on my birthday that’s turns out to be all mental health shit like serotonin, dopamine, routine activities, stable home life — I’m insulted and disrespected, reminded all over again about how he just didn’t get what happened to me (or pretended not to).

The conversation devolves into me trying to sympathetically explain how none of that was true. I repeat “that wasn’t it” and make an attempt to write it on his back, but his shirt is already off and he’s too sweaty for the marker to take.

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Dream Journal

Getting Around Thai Temple & Restaurant

I scoot over to the abandoned old Thai Temple brunch on south Valencia st. I learn the story of the five bear-men who were executed by hanging there, huge brutish men all murderers by the dozens. Their ghosts/projections give chase when I speed away on my black scooter.

To get out of this compound part of San Francisco, I need to walk through a Thai restaurant. It’s the third day in a row I’ve been there, but I don’t eat this time so I sneak past the staff, avoiding eye contact –like I’m just around there.

I locate my dad’s overgrown pickup in his workshop, new-ish but already rusted on the inside doorframe, and plants growing through the hard rubber hood. He has an active project he’s working on under lights nearby, but there’s sawdust everywhere. I consider whether I can clean it up.

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Dream Journal

Battle of Champions, Dad Doubles, Copacabana Clock

Fight between two champions, Denethor and Bison. Bison is big muscular guy who is hesitant. Denethor grabs spears but is defeated when Bison impales his leg with a sword, then another, then uses a hot spear to melt them through, then separates Denethor’s head to show him the wounds. Very brutal.

Circus show that uses a trailer that folds. It’s full of horses, which come off the trailer, and somehow become elephants on the beach where their audience sits. The elephants are blocked by black brontosaurs.

I am passing my dad, who waylays me on the way to somewhere. He talks to my doppelgänger too, and I understand this to be a delicate situation. As he recognizes me, I look him in the eyes and say “doubles” knowing it is the most respectful way to acknowledge us.

I am in a pool that uses white Armani tiles. In the far corner, away from two old women, I toss a towel onto one of the poolside chairs. There is a conical grandfather clock made of leather that I open up. It is 4 o’clock, and sunset. This is somewhere near the equator possibly in Brazil… Copacabana, Veracruz.

Copacabana is a neighborhood that I can view from up on the hillside where this pool is. There are a number of clubs, and I hear in my mind complicated music that experiments shifting with 4/4 time.

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Dream Journal

Strange New Apartment with Strange People

Was moving out of a place on Mission street. Went through a lost and found hamper that turned out to be filled with my own clothes. My dad was there cleaning also and put his stereo system and a bunch of CDs in his car. He drove down Mission street fast enough to spin out into a storefront made with cutouts of San Francisco.

I was in the elevator to a possible new apartment with Lynae. I had a metal cart filled with our stuff. We were headed for the eighth floor but the elevator stopped at the seventh. Not noticing, we got off, but I got back on once we realized. Lynae couldn’t get back on and I couldn’t figure out how to get the elevator buttons to scroll up to the 8th floor. My doppelgänger came onto the elevator at this time; I was unsure whether to send him away or make out with him (as I’ve always expected I might). Finally I got to the 8th floor. Our former roommates Matt and Emily might’ve been the landlords. Outsides of people’s apartment doors was decorated with knickknacks and tasteful lighting. I entered my prospective home and met the roommates who lived there. Most were very attractive 20-something girls, including a pair of twins who looked like my attractive Australian acquaintance Hemmy. One of the twins had a developmental abnormality that affected her symmetry… she had three breasts and, when she casually rolled over, I saw two assholes. I engaged in easy, free-flowing conversation with all the roommates from a ledge in their open plan home. Due to the liberated vibe I was sitting with my dick hanging out; unfortunately where I was sitting only one girl could see it and she was the least attractive to me. The apartment was decorated with colorful lace curtains and pastels, underlit beds and fancy framed art. It had a view out to the city and as I and a few of the girls watched, a van driving a trailer drove off a nearby roof. It fell a ways before veering up, as if swimming against the force of gravity.

The dream began to fall apart as I realized how dream-like it was, but I pulled an interesting trick. I pretended that I had simply blacked-out in the dream world (perhaps taken a bad pill). This worked, and I ended up back in the sexy apartment with the two-breasted twin showing me that she had gone through my art works and found one she wanted to build off of (it was a pressed plastic sheet of a skateboard wheel with the word ‘concrete’ embossed above it). We made out and it was intense, pulling each other’s hair and fervently tonguing.

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Dream Journal

Naked but Not Crazy

Dreamed I was walking through the streets of the Haight with Lynae, nighttime. I was naked after the end of a hard day and some body encumberence. It was pretty awesome but as Lynae got paranoid about people seeing me she dragged me back a little. I was psychically connected to her and kind of slipped out of this invisible magic underwear belt binding me together. She ran off and I went on myself. The police showed up quickly and I was left to hide lying still behind an old car leaning near a fence, assuming they’d look under the cars. I evaded them awhile then came back and people assumed, again, that I’d gone crazy. Still not wanting to explain enlightenment I talked to my dad, asking “well what do you think I did?” “You ingested something a little while before, and…” I interrupted and explained it was simpler than that: I wanted to do what I was doing and it was a good idea. My dad cracked and told me about this Asian couple which had been “smoking him out”. My possessions were being sifted through by other friends and sorted for transport, I don’t know where.

There was a baby someone was taking care of, an incredibly precocious toddler with wispy hair carried from one room to the other. She told about how fast it takes to get to the moon when you ride your bed (imagine it?). She had different body shells it turned out, and her brain was switched into a different one so that body could be bathed. The body immediately started complaining that it wanted the brain back and it hated keeping its brain in its butt. The body with the brain, smaller, maybe a newborn, did a play-dumb routine that was instantly recognizable as clever. I thought it would be easier to bathe the body with no brain.

Sitting in a golf cart in a living room with two women in their house. The cart started going upstairs of its own accord seemingly but no one acted concerned. It was enchanted to do that, or was somehow intelligent.

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Dream Journal

5 Dreams and an Exercise

A computer setup outside, with a large monitor (F.O.B.F. Monitor) and little lamp to light up the space. Multiple music stands placed behind the desk, next to window. Could be a Canadian spy.

Large TV that had VHS tapes you could put in the base. Mom (or dad?) was acting up and yelling and I slapped them, they seemed surprised but satisfied, like I’d done what I was supposed to do.

Miners loft filled with junk in rocky valley, difficult to find good map route to it. Somewhat next to log cabin.

Angel Island octopus can shape it’s body into jet, fly around and confuse people. When the water is dark it glows.

Old Arabic man with a ladder is trying to clean his house, ends up scraping the walls up and damaging it (house on Kemper ct.).

As an exercise, I was awake for a long time during the night asking questions and trying to answer them the wrong way.